If Only...

You see it every day in some way or another and if you are like me, it drives you nuts.

Women so self centered, oblivious, or just don't seem to care that their actions or inactions are making things difficult for those around them.

You know the things I am talking about.

That woman in the turning lane at the red light who is talking away on her cell phone and doesn't notice the arrow turn green. That green arrow does not last long and when you honk at her to get her attention, she turns around to give you a dirty look for daring to disturb her conversation then finally goes just as the light turns red again.

The women in the theater answering their phones during the movie disturbing those that paid a lot of money to watch.

Grocery stores seem to be where these woman really decide to behave badly.

You see it all the time.

You get only a few things, perhaps some ice cream in the hot summer, so you go to the express lane for 20 items or less only to find that the woman 2 places up is unloading a nearly full cart saying its only a few more.

The woman holding up a line arguing that she should be able to use expired coupons.

Or she says she forgot something and takes her time going who knows where while people are waiting.

Waits until the cashier is finished ringing up everything to remember she has coupons and start looking for them.

Or she waits until everything is rung up before taking out her checkbook to fill the check out.. she could have had it ready with all but the total written in. Then after filling it out, is surprised that the cashier wants to see identification so starts searching.

Or is talking on her phone while slowly unloading her cart one item at a time while the cashier rings it up and waits for the next item.

Then there are the cashiers at banks or other places that while you are at the head of the line and it is your turn, stop to answer the phone and talk to them or take their order, and when finally done, she asks what it was you needed again.

While most people would just get mad or want to yell at them, you and I are both thinking the same thing.

She needs a good spanking!

How great would it be if the beleagured victims of these selfish women, could just hang up her phone, bend her over the nearest table and take their belt to her.

Or better yet there is a paddle or cane hanging up at every checkout line.

I know I wouldn't mind waiting a couple extra minutes while one of these women were dealt with.

Line em up and spank em!

A good hard spanking is just what they need and I would bet that grocery shopping and traffic would run a whole lot smoother and efficiently if we were allowed to give it to them.

When and what circumstances have you in daily life found yourself saying "she could do with a damn good spanking"?

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How it Began

The most amazing record has been found.

It is believed to be a story that has been passed down thru generations that recorded the fascinating origin of important events.

This is the rough translation..

Oogoo came home from another very rough day. They were always rough, but this one seemed even more so.

As usual, his day consisted of him and the other men in the tribe going out hunting and skinning and territory skirmishes with other tribes. Fresh food was needed every day and skins as well for clothing and other uses around the caves.

It might seem like daylight hours would be long enough, but, everything took 3 times as long then what with everyone trying to get around on all fours.

On this day OOgoo was worn out more so than usual and had stopped off with his mates for some cactus beer to unwind. He knew he would hear about it from his nagging wife and he was right.

When he got back to his cave, he took off his skin garment as they always did in the summer with it being so warm in the cave. There was his wife Mooga waiting. Oh how she carried on about his being late, about how he had said they would be moving caves months ago, how hot the summer days have been, how little meat he had been bringing back lately, how she didn't like him drinking cactus beer. She continued to carry on even as preparing dinner.

Oogoo had to put up with this every day and as usual tried to tune her out.

Then she started yelling at him about the mosquitoes that he had let in. At least this was a real worry as the mosquitoes were much bigger then and could cause quite the discomfort, so while she crouched there cooking, he went about trying to get rid of them.

Then he noticed one had landed on her butt. So, he bashed it with his large rough hand. She gave a yelp and berated him for striking even as he tried to explain that he saved her from a bite.

When she turned back around to continue dinner preparation, he sat there staring for a bit, then gave her another whack on the butt. She yelped again and told him to quit it and to just wave any mosquitoes away instead since his hand had stung.

Oogoo, sat there for a minute, and then without warning, dragged Mooga over his big legs and just kept whacking away at her butt with his large hard hand.

After a while, she started shrieking with every swat as the pain and fire started building. The slaps and her cries sounded loudly thru the cave and had brought the neighbors to form a curious audience as they crouched around the cave entrance watching.

They all watched as Oogoo was telling Mooga that he was sick of all her complaining and nagging and wanted it to stop. Mooga was crying and saying she would behave and she would treat him better, promising to be ever so good.

The neighbors took great notice in this, especially men who had similar problems and they made plans to try the same method.

when, Oogoo finally let her up after a couple more minutes of continuous swatting, she next did something that truly astounded everyone.

She leapt off his lap, and stood up and started frantically rubbing her stinging butt. She had stood up on two feet!

Soon everyone tried standing up and realized how much better everything would be from now on. Both in their caveholds and getting around every day.

And that, everyone is how spanking got started and how man discovered how to stand upright.
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the sex storie of a pizza girl

Introduction: Re-posting all three parts in one spot.
The Story of My Pizza Girl.
By ZondarTheBear

Author's Note: I'm going to be re-posting some of my multi-part stories so that they can be read in their entirety without having to search out each part. I'm starting with this one because it is close to my heart.

Warning: There is enough 'watersports' in the story to earn it a proper tagging, but, really, its not that much. If you don't like pee games at all, don't read the story, if you do like them, or don't really care one way or the other, then lay on McDuff! (Pun intended)

Chapter One

I felt old, really old. The recession had smashed my businesses and taken my life savings; I suddenly found my world broken and bankrupt. The only way for me to make any money was to deliver pizzas. It was humiliating for me to do a job that I’d done as a teenager, but it was the only thing that would pay my bills.

The only bright spot was a pizza maker that had just been hired; her name was Anna and she was more than twenty years younger than me, but I loved to make her laugh. She wasn’t like a lot of girls her age, she had no problem with dirty jokes or a forty-five-year-old man flirting with her when he gave her a ride to the bus stop.

It was harmless fun, just an old man’s fantasy until the night that she worked really late, and I volunteered to give her a ride home. She lived way across town, and I didn't want her to ride the bus in the middle of the night.

We talked and laughed as we drove down the freeway; my jokes got dirtier and dirtier; she knew that I was harmless, but I didn't know that she wasn’t. I didn't want to end our time together, so I agreed when she suggested hitting a drive-thru and eating in the car.

We’d parked the car in a dark corner of her apartment complex. She nibbled on a french-fry and listened to me talk; if felt good to have someone listen to me again. I sat with a fry sticking out of my mouth, pretending that it was a cigarette, when she leaned over and bit it out of my mouth, her lips brushing against mine.

I gasped in surprise and sucked the rest of the fry down my throat, making me cough and choke. She squeaked in alarm and began to pat my back while I recovered. “I’m sorry, ol’ man, I didn't mean to do that, I just wanted to kiss you.”

I wiped the tears from my eyes and choked out, “Why would you want to do that? I’m twice your age. A pretty girl like you can have any guy she wanted.”

She smiled and said, “You’re always talking about how you want to find a little girl with daddy issues, I assumed that you wanted to get some young pussy. I really like you, you’re funny and now I wanna get some from you. Please tell me that you’re not as harmless as you claim to be.”

“I’m only as harmless as you want me to be, Anna. If you truly want me, I’ll do my very best for you. But if you don’t, then this would be a cruel joke to play on a friend.”

She pulled her t-shirt up and showed me her D cup bra. “Make me scream, Barry, I really want you to.” Her bra opened in the front and her big, naked breasts were soon in my hands, then in my mouth a moment later. I lathered her nipples with spit and sucked them deep into my mouth, pulling and nipping at her as she started moaning and clutching at my head.

She'd changed out of her work pants and into a short, ruffled skirt, as my hand slid up her leg, I understood why. My fingers brushed against her pubic hair and jerked back, a bit surprised to find no panties. She grinned at me and said, “I knew I was gonna try and fuck you; I didn't want any distractions.”

She reached over and unbuckled my belt; my pants were down around my thighs a moment later. We struggled with the seat for a bit, but soon had it laid back and she was in my lap. Her pussy slid along my hard-on, rubbing her juices all over the shaft; I lifted her skirt and watched my cock press between her lips. She kept her pubes trimmed, but not shaved; I smiled, a woman’s bush was so sexy. She scooted forward and my head slipped inside of her and she slid down in one quick stroke.

I groaned as her inner heat enveloped my cock down to the roots. She squeezed me with her pussy muscles and hunched against my hips as I licked and sucked her hanging breasts. My fingers reached around and probed at her asshole. “You can rub it, ol’ man, but don’t go inside right now; I gotta poop before we do that. We’ll save it for next time.”

Next time! Yes!

She started sliding up and down on my cock, moaning as I found her clit and rubbed it with my thumb. “Oh, God,” I moaned, “you are so God-damn tight. I’m gonna cum any second.”

“You cum right in my pussy, ol’ man, I’m on the pill.”

“Here it cums, sweetie, here it cums!” I hunched up and shot a massive load inside of her pussy. She clenched my cock after each pulse and shuddered in her own orgasm. A dozen thick, gooey ropes of semen splattered her womb. I lifted my face and found her lips; she sucked on my tongue and stabbed hers into my mouth. She moaned and ground her hips against me.

My thumb brought her to another shuddering orgasm before she collapsed against me and muttered, “I knew you’d be a good fuck, I just knew it.”

“Sweetie,” I responded, rubbing my hands under her shirt and caressing her skin, ”you did most of the work, I just kind of sat there. If you do decide that there will, in fact, be a next time, I plan on licking every erogenous zone that you possess, until you turn entirely liquid, then I’m gonna drink all of you up, metaphorically speaking. Then I’m gonna fuck you ‘till you beg me to stop, or you pass out from cumming.”

She eased off my cock and slid her head down to my lap. Her mouth found my limp meat and sucked it inside, tugging and slurping on me until I was completely clean, then continued to work at me as I grew in her mouth. Her head bobbed up and down as her tongue slithered around my cockhead and down the shaft. She was like a wet furnace as she worked my pole and fondled my ballsack. I groaned and ran my hands through her hair as I hunched into her mouth, “Oh, sweetie, it’s a miracle! If you keep doing that, I’m going to blow my nut juice right down your throat.”

She nodded and sucked even harder; my toes curled as I lifted my hips up from the car seat and fired my cum into her mouth. Her tongue pressed my head against the roof of her mouth as she swallowed the first shot; it happened again with the next, and the next. She sucked and gulped each squirt of semen until she had me drained of fluid; she continued to nuzzle me until I was too sensitive to stand it any more.

She sat up and ran her tongue around her lips and smiled at me. “You taste good, ol’ man. I’m gonna suck you a lot. Now take me home, you’re gonna fuck me in the asshole ‘till I piss on the floor.”

My fingers found the keys and a moment later we pulled up to her front door. “My momma is out ‘til tomorrow night” she said as we went through her apartment door, “and my brother is out with his friends; he won’t be back all weekend. We have plenty of time to get all nasty.” We headed to her bedroom and into the bathroom beyond. She stripped nude and my cock shot up for an unprecedented third round.

She was a lovely young thing, surely an adult but holding tightly to the last of her childhood. She had shoulder length brown hair and ears that stuck out just a tiny bit; I wanted to hold them and kiss her mouth all night. She stripped me naked in seconds; I was uncomfortable with my body, gravity had been mostly kind to me, but I was still no spring chicken. I’d made an effort to lose some weight lately, and my short haircut hid most of the gray; I hoped she didn't find me to be ugly.

I was married to my first wife a year before she was born. My son is a year older than she is.

I kept my eyes on the floor, not wanting to see disappointment in her eyes, until she chucked her finger under my chin and pushed up until my eyes met hers. “You ain’t got nothing to be ashamed about, Barry, you look wonderful. Now, I’m gonna take a shit, then you’re gonna fuck my asshole good.” She squatted on the toilet and spread her legs wide, I watched as her pussy opened a bit and a stream of piss shot into the toilet. From discussions that we’d had in the past I knew that she wasn't into pee games, and I generally wasn’t either, but it was just seemed so intimate for her to do such a private thing in front of me.

I knelt down in front of her and rubbed her legs; her skin was so soft. While she peed, a turd slid from her asshole and plopped into the toilet; I mostly ignored it, poop wasn't a thing for me at all, not even from an asshole as amazing as hers. Her stream sputtered to a stop and she wiped everything clean with tissue. When she was done, and the toilet flushed, I fulfilled my promise to her.

Her bed wasn't huge, but I made it work for us. Every erogenous zone was targeted and thoroughly poured over; the back of her knees, arm pits, ears, mouth, neck, everywhere. I rubbed her skin, tickling her and making her moan; every inch of her wonderful, heavy breasts were licked and sucked and massaged. The salty sweat on her skin was ambrosia on my tongue. My cock rose and fell and rose again. By the time I zeroed in on her pussy, she was a mass of limp flesh, ready to be drank down by a thirsty old man.

I didn’t care that she had some of my load still in her, she tasted wonderful and I ate her until her juices poured into my mouth. My tongue slid up and down her slit, swallowing every drop of her liquid that I could find; her clit was ravaged until she quivered and cried out. She pushed my head away and, after taking a deep breath, she flopped over onto her stomach and spread her asscheeks wide. “Stick it in, ol’ man,” she gasped, “drive it in my asshole.”

I slid up over her and sank all the way into her shit-shute. We both moaned as my cock found the deepest part of her anus. My hands circled her big breasts and gently squeezed as I rested with my cock insider of her. She pulled her hips down and slammed back into me; I took the hint and began to fuck her in earnest. She matched me stroke for stroke as she reached under and began to play with her clit.

I hunched hard into her and kept going until she groaned and shuddered; her pussy juice splattered my swinging nutsack as she came again and again. I stayed hard, and fucked her deep, far longer than I’d ever gone before; soon she was ready for me to cum inside of her.

She reached over her shoulder and palmed my cheek as she turned to kiss me. “Cum in my asshole, ol’ man.” She whispered, her voice husky with passion, “Squirt it deep inside of me. I wanna feel your juice in my shitter…”

Her words drove me over the top and I let her have what she wanted. I was surprised by the volume I pumped into her, it was my third go after all; she took at least five ropes of thick, hot juice from my cock deep inside of her. I cried out as she clamped down on my shaft and sprayed my nuts with another shot of girl-juice.

When I was done, I all but collapsed across her; my cock slipped from her asshole and she giggled at the feeling. She squeezed her cheeks together and penguin-walked into her bathroom. I followed behind her and watched as she pushed and my cum drained from her asshole into the toilet with a wet sounding fart behind it.

More piss flowed out of her as she reached over to the sink and found a washcloth; she was a multi-tasker for sure. When the washcloth was good and soaked, she motioned me over and thoroughly cleaned her butt residue from my pecker.

“You need to piss ol’ man?” I considered for a moment and nodded. She sat back and spread her legs wide. “Go ahead, if you hit my pussy with it, try to aim for my clit, like I do with the shower massager, let’s see if I can get another cum going. ” I aimed my soft dick at her and let a stream shoot out. She moaned as it slammed into her clit; I can piss for a long, long time, she came two more times before it sputtered out.

I slid between her legs and nuzzled her breasts, she kissed my forehead and stroked my hair as I hugged her tight to my chest. They say you can survive anything if there’s someone there that you care about; my life didn't seem too bad anymore. We took a shower together; no hanky-panky, we were both completely wore out. I washed her, she washed me; when we were clean she fell asleep and I went home because neither of us felt like dealing with her family the next day.

Chapter Two

The next night at work was less awkward that it should have been. The only sign that anything was different was that we mostly ignored each other, instead of play-flirting like we usually did. It was busy so we had almost no time to talk anyway.

When the rush ended and Ryan, the manager, left things to the closing Assistant Manager, Ben, who liked nothing more than to sit on his ass in the office and we finally had a few moments to ourselves in the back of the kitchen. She smiled shyly and poked my shoulder with her finger, "How you doin' ol' man?"

I grinned at her and said quietly, "My pecker's a little sore, we really gave it a workout last night."

"Yeah, my entire...area...is rubbed raw. You're a horny old goat, you know that?" She looked around then quickly kissed me hard. "I need some more of that wonderful schlong. You think you can get it up later?"

I pushed her hand against my pants. Her eyes got big and she said, "Well, I guess you can. Do you close tonight?" I shook my head. "Good, can we go to your place this time? My brother came home early." I nodded. Another quick kiss and she headed off to make an order that came in from the internet. I ran my fingers over my lips and shook my head. I just could not believe that she wanted me. My eyes started to fill with tears, so I went out the back door until I got myself under control.

My world had been shit for so long, that I'd almost forgotten what it felt like to be even a little bit happy. After years of struggle, my entire financial picture had gone up in flames; the new electronic book readers had finally sent my bookstore into bankruptcy, taking my own pizza place with it. When I declared personal bankruptcy, my wife decided that she'd had enough and headed for younger pastures, in the guise of one of my former employees.

Now, almost a year later, I was just beginning to stabilize and look for a new path in life. I wiped my eyes and headed back inside; there were still pizzas to get out, and now I had an evening to look forward to.

"My house is shit, but it's cheap and there's no one to bother us." I felt that honesty would always be the best policy with this young lady; if I were to be damned, let it be for what I was, not what I pretended to be.

We pulled into my driveway and sat for a moment. She reached for my cheek and turned me towards her. "I live with my mom and my brother and make pizzas for a living. I don't really have any plans for the future. Wherever you think you are in life, I'm not far from it myself." She held up her hand, "Yes, you've said it before, your age makes it different, and I get that, but if we're in the same place, why not be there together?"

I could not find fault with her logic, mostly because I didn't want to, not if it meant spending my time without her, but I had to ask, "What do you mean by `together'? Do you just wanna fuck around or do you mean something more serious? I'm a year older than your mother; you're a year younger than my son, this is going to be complicated as fuck."

"How `bout we worry about what today brings, and let tomorrow sort itself out when it gets here. Let's go inside, my pussy's aching for you dick." Her ass swayed back and forth as she walked ahead of me to my front door. Any objection that my mind may have formed turned to sand as she yanked her t-shirt over her head just inside the front door. My hands slid around and cupped her breasts as I kissed the soft skin on her shoulder and nuzzled my cock into her asscrack.

She reached back and ran her hands through my hair while I skimmed my thumbs over her hardening nipples; I absolutely loved her big, heavy breasts. My foot kicked the door shut as I slid around to her front and sucked at her lacy bra cup, making it wet with my saliva; she pulled me tight to her chest and hummed quietly in pleasure. My knees hit the carpet and I pulled her pants down past her knees. Her panties were lacy and transparent; they were soon around her calves as my tongue slipped between her
wet labia.

The next thing I knew we were in a sweaty sixty-nine, with her on top and my head between her thighs. Her pants were still pushed down to her calves; they cushioned my head as she ground her pussy into my face. The smell of sweat and her arousal was strong as my nose poked into her hole; my tongue knew almost instinctively where to go to drive her absolutely up the wall. I ate and sucked and slurped at her until she clenched tight and her orgasming pussy grabbed at my probing fingers. She ground her
clit against my stubble and soaked my face with her leaking juice.

My hands ran up and down her back I dealt with her bra hooks and she lifted up to give me room to caress her heavy breasts. After her orgasm, she concentrated on bobbing her head on my hard meat. Her lips formed a perfect vacuum as she sucked me deep and pulled back to lick around the head; I cried out and filled her mouth with my cum; she sucked and swallowed each thick, hot gush as it sprayed over her tongue.

When we were both spent, she wiggled around and snuggled her head under my chin. Her hair smelled like pizza; I'm sure mine did also. My arms wrapped around her and squeezed her tight. She whimpered and melted against me. I had no idea where this would go, but I was willing to hang of for as long as the ride lasted.

After the second night we started putting in schedule requests that gave us maximum time together; we couldn't match them perfectly because we had different jobs in the restaurant, but we did our best. If anyone suspected us, they gave no indication; even if it occurred to them, they would dismiss their suspicions with a snort, why the hell would a hot young thing like her spend time with an old geezer like me? If I couldn't figure it out, why the fuck would they?

By the second week, she'd moved into my house; no more late-night bus rides for her. Her favorite thing was to rub my cock every time she passed me at work. I'd grab sauce or cheese from the walk-in fridge and she'd give me a quick squeeze while my hands were full; by the end of the night, I'd have my cock deep inside her asshole before we pulled out of the parking lot. We would both be so fucking horny that we'd spray my car's seats in seconds, then head home and fuck ourselves boneless.

Having this lovely young lady in my life dragged me, kicking and screaming, out of my depression; she was just so...so...oomph...that it was impossible to stay sad around her. With my head back in the game, I put together a few friends and bought out a single unit pizza place not far from our home; we both put in our notice at the same time. Ignorant eyes were suddenly opened and mouths dropped to the floor; our last few days were spent answering pushy questions and assuring people that we were not, in fact, crazy (but maybe she was).

Within six months, we were both making double what we had made working for other people; unfortunately, that still made us poor, because even twice our old pay sucked ass with a straw. It took
another six months for our finances to loosen up so we could move from my little shit-hole house into a new luxury apartment. She picked it out because it had a hot tub in the private deck area
behind the unit.

"Okay, sweetie, that's the last of the boxes, you sure you didn't hurt your old self hauling our shit around?" I threw a pillow at her and headed out to the Jacuzzi. She was right, moving was a cold-stone bitch now. My muscles screamed at me as I sank into the steaming hot water; she stripped naked and flipped the jets on with her toe as she settled onto my lap. "I'm sorry honey, I know that you're tired, I just can't help myself sometimes, you're so sensitive about our age difference, even after all this time."

She kissed me and rubbed her pussy against my shaft. Fatigue was an issue, but my cock could not resist the siren call of her big titties smushed into my face. I kissed her between her breasts and thumbed her nipples as she settled her pussy onto my hard member. She slid up and down on me and squeezed my dick with her inner muscles; ten seconds later I painted her womb with my semen. I thanked God every day that she was a quick cummer because I could never last more than a minute or so inside of her amazing body. She felt me shoot inside of her and shuddered in her own orgasm. My semen was an aphrodisiac to her; she never failed to cum when I did.

I stayed inside of her and sucked on her tongue as we both came down from our sex high. She continued to squeeze me with her pussy as we kissed; it was also a good thing that she could always get me up for a second, and sometimes a third round. My cock grew hard inside of her and she nodded at my unspoken question. She lifted up and aimed me at her anus; she loved to have me deep inside her back door.

When I was all the way inside of her, we sat quietly and held each other tight, "Oh, sweetie," she sighed, as she gently hunched against my groin, "I love you so much." Her feelings for me never failed to bring a tear to my eye; she was so pure in her every thought and action. I'd never met anyone like her. "Oh, God, I gotta pee, sweetie, but I don't want to take your cock out of my asshole. Can I just pee here?" I nodded and felt her bladder relax. I couldn't really tell when she let loose because the bubbles and hot water masked her spray.

She hummed and shivered as she pissed into the water; her asshole loosened up even more as she went, and I slipped another half inch into her asshole. I pushed my hand between our legs and felt her stream pulse against my palm. My middle finger slipped inside of her and my thumb ran over her clit. She moaned even louder and her ass clenched around my cock as she came again. Her orgasms were my own trigger and I filled her anus with my cum; I moaned my pleasure against her chest as each pulse jetted from my cock. Hot water slopped out onto the deck as she ground herself onto my finger and cock.

We hugged and snuggled for another hour or so until we were exhausted and ready for bed; I made a mental note to drain and clean the hot tub the next morning and we headed off to shower and sleep.

Another six months and it was Christmas. Sales at the pizza place had picked up considerably and we were now thinking about buying a second restaurant; I was hesitant because a second unit meant that we would work twice as hard, but not for twice the money. Both units would need a manager, and I would act as supervisor. It was a gamble and I had lost my taste for gambling when I went bankrupt. We decided to wait another year, unless an opportunity came up that was too good to pass up.

I'd been right about her mother, she absolutely hated me since the first time we met. It took everything that I could do to slowly, ever so slowly bring her around. Now that the business was picking up, she tolerated me more than she use to. She reluctantly decided that, as long as we were happy, and I could
support her daughter, she would get on board. I never bothered to tell her that it was her daughter who had brought me back from the brink all those months ago; let her have her old-fashioned point of view, it didn't harm us.

Chapter Three

The following June we opened our second unit. The deal was perfect and I was comfortable with the managers that we’d chosen to run each place. We both made sure that we had a lot of face time with the employees, but let the managers manage. I’d been wrong about the money and the time involved in a second unit; profits were more than double and we worked far less now that we had reliable employees at each place.

“Okay, ol’ man,” she said abruptly one evening, “now we talk about the future.” She’d spent the entire morning in bed with a cold; even though she looked like hell, she was still beautiful in my eyes. Her words cut through me like a knife. I just knew that she’d found someone else; a younger someone else.

I carefully sat down on the edge of the bed and waited for her to continue. She laughed and began to cough; I rested my hand on her leg and waited for it to stop. “You always look so scared every time the future comes up.” She chuckled some more and said, “I want to marry you, you dirty old fucker.”

My eyes blinked with incomprehension. “Hello?! Old Man? Did you hear me?” I nodded. “Say something!” My mouth opened and closed and I burst into tears. “Oh, fuck.” A mound of tissues avalanched to the floor as she wrapped her fever-hot arms around me.

Our foreheads touched; her blazing hot head was soaked with fever-sweat. “I just don’t understand why you would pick me.” I said, wiping my wet cheeks and snorting to keep the boogers in place. Her eyes filled and the boogers actually escaped from her nose. She jerked back and grabbed yet another tissue and blew till it seemed her head would collapse inward.

“I know why I first wanted to be with you.” she answered, as she continued to wipe at her bright red nose, “I admired you. You lost everything that you’d worked for for far longer than I’ve been alive and you just kept going; even at your lowest point, when your wife disappeared on you with that guy, you still had a smile for me and a light joke to make my day better. How could I not want to spend time with someone who makes me feel so good?

“I didn’t expect all this to happen,” she continued, “I figured that you just wanted a fuck-buddy and would toss a silly little girl like me aside as soon as you had a better option. It would have killed me if you did, but I had to take that chance. You know that I love you and I can’t stand the thought of losing you. I knew that you would never ask me to marry you, because you still think that you’re not good enough for me, so I decided to do it for you. Now, if you don’t say that you’ll marry me right now, I’ll keep hounding you until you do. I’ll stalk your old ass if I have to; it shouldn’t be too hard, you can’t move very fast anymore.” Her watery eyes showed amusement; even in so serious a moment, she still loved to poke me about my age.

“If you truly want to hitch your wagon to this old donkey,” I said carefully as I looked into her eyes, “I’ll do my best to pull you in the right direction. When do you want this unlikely pairing to be formalized?”

“As soon as I’m over this Goddamn cold.” She answered, blowing more boogers into a fresh tissue. “I want a tacky Vegas wedding, the tackier the better; it’ll make my mother go fucking nuts.”

“I would very much like to make your mother go nuts; I just hope that she doesn't gut me the next time she sees me. I’m not exactly the son-in-law on the hall mark card, you know.”

“You think that’s bad?” She asked with a gleam of evil in her puffy red eyes. “I want a baby in my belly before we get back from our honeymoon…whoa, that was a weird face. What did it mean?”

“It meant that I’m forty-seven years old; I’d be retirement age when this baby was headed off to college. I could die before it happens; my family isn’t known for its long lifelines. Anna, are you sure, and I mean SURE, that you want to have a baby, not to mention a marriage, with someone as old as me? I’m on board with this, but you know that this is a huge thing.”

“Barry, any of us could die at any time; I had a friend drop dead from a brain aneurysm when we were in fourth grade.” She touched my cheek, “I’ve wanted this since the first time that you made me laugh. We’d both had such so much shit land on us that day; your wife served you with the divorce papers and one of my brother’s low-life friends stole our television and he lied about it and caused that huge fight. Even with all the bad shit that was happening in your life that day you took one look at me and dropped everything to make sure that I was all right. That stupid little face you made when you were making fun of my asshole brother almost made me pee my pants.”

She punched me in the arm and finished, “You already said yes ol’ man, it was a weird donkey metaphor, but it was a yes nonetheless; there’s no take-backs here. You’re gonna marry me in a shitty little Nevada chapel, and you’re gonna knock me the fuck up in a big ol’ hotel room overlooking the Las Vegas strip and we’re gonna drop ten grand at the Black Jack table, because we can afford it now and you need to stop being so tight with the bucks and enjoy yourself for once.” So we did.

Chapter 4

“Ah now p’rnounce y’all man an’ wife, baby. You go on an’ kiss that little lady.” He was the King, and one must obey the King. I leaned down and pressed my lips against my new bride’s. The hired witnesses clapped and whistled; my son, who had surprisingly agreed to be my best man, clapped me on the shoulder and hugged me from behind. My new mother-in-law glared at me from the front row of the ‘church’. Anna had said tacky, and “The Church of Elvis, the King”, two miles off the Strip, was as tacky as it got. This Elvis was almost seven feet tall and weighed about a buck fifty at best, he was a walking pole; it was perfect.

After a small reception dinner that included my beaming offspring and my bride’s reluctantly polite mother, we all headed to the tables to blow ten grand, as ordered. It seems that my luck had finally turned completely around because we were up almost fifty thousand by the time we turned in for the night, or should I say morning. I gave the original ten to my son and wished him well as he headed back home. He was my new mother-n-law’s escort for the trip back; he would need all the luck and patience he could muster.

The casino comped us our honeymoon suite and the view was exactly as requested; the lights of Vegas poured through our floor-to-ceiling picture window as we stood watching and contemplating our lives. She turned to me after a while and said, softly, “Gimme that cock, ol’ man, I’m as fertile as any woman
ever was; you’re gonna bun my oven if I have to drain every ounce of fluid from your body. No foreplay, no ass-fucking and no swallowing. For the next week, you’re gonna plant your seed every
time that thing can get hard.” So I did.

Her shiny white jumpsuit hit the floor and my shiny blue one flopped on top of it; she kept her tiny white wedding veil on, but nothing else. Her mouth nearly swallowed me as she lathered every inch of my cock; when I was standing straight up, we lay on our wedding clothes and I slipped inside of her. She gripped my cock with her muscles and squeezed; I pumped twice and fired my first load of goo inside of her. She didn’t even have time to get wet herself.

Fortunately, she was like a bottle of little blue pills on my libido and I didn’t even go soft before I was pumping into her again. This time she wrapped her arms and legs around me and bit my shoulder to keep from screaming her pleasure out across the rising sun. Her cum triggered my second load and when I was done shooting into her, she pushed me off and dragged me to the bed. She sucked me hard and probed at my asshole until I was standing proud for a third time; she rode me reverse-cowgirl and pumped her finger into my asshole, rubbing my prostate to get a huge third load deep into her unprotected womb.

When she came down from our third orgasm, we dropped off to sleep for almost ten hours. The next afternoon, we fucked twice before heading off to the buffet for some much needed protein. We lost two grand at roulette and gained six more at Black Jack before heading back to the room and fucking two more times and dropping off to sleep another ten hours.

We stayed about even at the tables for the next few days while we continued to fuck the nights away. The last three days we spent going to shows and other tourist attractions; we both wanted to fuck at the Hoover dam, but there was just no way to make it happen.

Our final day was just spent in bed, just cuddling and watching television and doing all the sex stuff that we’d ignored before. I sucked her pussy ‘till my tongue wanted to cramp and she swallowed my load twice before I planted another two loads deep into her asshole. If she wasn’t pregnant, she never would be; I’d given her a river of cum to swim in, I knew that I was still potent, the dick-doc said so.

Chapter 5

Over the next few months, we purchased another pizza unit and spent most of our time building a solid crew for all three places. Sixty-three days after we got back from Vegas, Anna threw up into a bucket of sauce; needless to say, we replaced the sauce before we headed off to the store to buy a stick for her to pee on.

It turned blue and I turned purple; I was almost forty-eight years old and I was gonna be a father again. We kept the news to ourselves until it was confirmed by a doctor, then we waited a few more weeks to make sure that everything was all right. Once the ultrasound showed us things were all good, the first person we called was my son, Barry Junior, to tell him that he was gonna be a brother.

He about shit himself; he loved Anna and thought having a baby brother or sister was going to be amazing, weird, but amazing. Her mother made it clear that she wanted me dead; not in so many words, but her feelings were clear enough. I’d given up on ever doing better than a Korea-type truce with her.

We held off on buying another pizza place and concentrated on making the three we had the best possible; we found new and better sources for our ingredients and experimented with dough formulas and sauce spices. We developed a strong customer feedback system that helped us to tailor our products and prices to each neighborhood. We paid back our original investors with a nice profit and bought a new house with room for our growing family.

I absolutely loved her growing stomach, her bellybutton started to poke out and she was diligent about keeping moisturized to limit her stretch marks. Our new house also had a nice Jacuzzi like our old apartment did and, on the advice of her doctor, she spend many hours floating in ninety-eight degree water to relieve the physical stress of her pregnancy.

Anna got hornier and hornier as she grew great with our child. Around six months along it became more and more difficult for her to control her bladder when she came.

“Okay, ol’ man, time for a soak.” I groaned in mock pain as she grabbed my hand and pulled me out to the Jacuzzi room. She looked so funny when she waddled; I carefully stifled my snort, but she glared over her shoulder at me. I slipped up behind her and matched her funny gait with my own and leaned down to nibbled at her shoulder. When the door to the hot tub room closed behind us I slid my hands around her great belly and slowly opened each button of her maternity shirt. Her skin was softer than ever and I ran my hands all around her belly, pausing to play with her outie-button. She giggled and slapped my hands away.

Our nightly ritual began with an all over massage of hot oil to keep her stretch marks to a minimum. I worked diligently, going over every part of her skin, squeezing and kneading her tired muscles. Her breasts received much loving attention as I licked the flavored oil from her hard nipples. She moaned and shuddered; she was so much more sensitive now and all it took was the slightest stimulation to get her off. A series of light kisses marked the trail down her belly as I place my ear to her stomach and listened to the gurgles that I decided was our active baby, not dinner being turned into poop.

Her maternity pants slid to the deck before she sat back against the edge of the hot tub and spread her legs. Her bush was seventies-wild at this point; she wanted me to trim her since she could no longer reach to do it herself, but I refused. I loved her wild curlies and she soon resigned herself to the situation since she couldn’t see what it looked like anymore.

My mouth found her clit and I softly brushed my tongue over it; she shuddered again. I continued my oil massage down her legs. When she was completely oiled up, I ran my slippery thumb over her button and she lay back and moaned loudly. Loud squishes soon filled the air as she grew amazingly moist; my fingers slipped inside of her and found her go-spot. A few seconds and another strong shudder had her cumming against my hand; after a few mishaps, I knew to keep my face away from her pussy when she came.

She spasmed open and closed on my fingers and a stream of urine shot out of her and splashed against my shirt; each clench caused another spurt to hit me. It embarrassed her the first few times it happened, but now we were both turned on by her mostly involuntary loss of control. When she was done cumming we eased her into the room temperature water so that she could float on its surface (her doctor said no hot water, only warm); she loved to float almost as much as she loved to cum.

While she settled in, I quickly stripped naked, dropped my pee-soaked shirt to the deck and slid in next to her. I dipped under the water to wash the urine from my skin and slipped up next to her head. She turned slightly, kissed me then lay back with her eyes closed. I watched her float and my heart filled
with her presence. She had inspired me to climb from the depth of my despair and re-join the human race; without her I would probably be dead by now but with her, my life had new meaning.

My arms slid around her and she jumped, startled, then grinned and snuggled against my shoulder. I held her close and ran my hand over her belly; the baby pushed against her from the inside and her hand ran in random patterns that looked fucking weird to see. “Man, that’s fucking weird.” Anna echoed my thoughts, “it feels like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. I want to go to college.”

It took a second for the sudden change in topic to register on my thoughts. When it did, I said, “Okay. It’s been decades since I fucked a co-ed.” She gaped at me in mock outrage and splashed water in my face.” I laughed and kissed her soundly. She wrapped my head in her arms and tried to devour me as our daughter poked at me from inside her mother.

“How ‘bout this,” I said when we came up for air, “We’ll get the fourth pizza place up and running, promote Sean to supervisor and put Kelly in his place at number two, then, when the baby is born and you feel comfortable leaving her with me while you do your thing, we’ll set you up for classes. I know that you graduated from high school, but I don’t know how you did; are you going to have to go to a community college or can you try for one of the traditional apply-and-hope places?”

She looked a bit uncomfortable as she said, “Community college, for sure. Before I met you, I had no ambition at all, I just wanted to coast through life; my grades coasted too, I was lucky to graduate at all.”

“Really?” I responded, “Me too. I was home schooled for the last two years. Now that you mentioned it, I want to further my education too. I’ll wait until the little one is in Kindergarten though. I’ll be what, fifty-two? That’s a good age to be a freshman; I’ll be banging a senior, make me a big man on campus.”

She laughed out loud and kissed me again. We wiggled around and my cock slipped into her pussy from behind. The water gently rocked us as we slowly fucked for almost an hour. When we were both ready, she leaned forwards onto her knees and grabbed the edge of the Jacuzzi as I began to push into her harder and faster. My cum shot out and found her deepest places as she clamped down on my dick and peed into the water. My balls jumped and wiggled as her spray pulsed out and hit them, almost

We paid Pima, one of our pizza employees, a large chunk of change each week to clean up our sex mess each day, and keep her mouth closed, while Anna was indisposed; she thought it was hilarious that we made love so often. I dropped our wet clothes into the washer, made a list for Pima of where we’d done it, and we went to bed.

Three months later, we welcomed our daughter, Hope, into the world.

Chapter 6

She squeezed the living fuck out of my hand until she ran out of breath and her head dropped back onto the bed; I held in my scream while she bellowed her’s out loud. She told me that she was going to be as loud as possible to see if she could freak out her mother, but this was genuine agony on her part. “Push, Anna, push!” The doctor told her, “The head is out, one more good push and you’re home free!” Her determined eyes locked onto mine then closed as she sucked in a deep breath and bore down hard; I saw our daughter’s shoulders slip from her mother’s body, followed quickly by the rest of her.

She hauled in a great lungful of air and screamed out her anger at the injustice of her birth. “It’s a girl! She’s beautiful, mommy. Dad, would you like to cut the cord?” I shook my head; no one here needed me to pass out. They did what they did and wrapped our little Hope in a blanket and settled her onto her
mother’s chest. The routine would begin soon but for now we rested and gathered our strength and I went down for an x-ray of my hand; it turns out that she had actually broke two of my fingers when she was squeezing them.

Seeing my baby daughter suckle at her mother’s breast filled me with a calm that never grew old. When Hope was full of milk and burped and changed and snuggled, Anna would hold my head and let me drink from her. I only took a small ration but the intimacy of our sharing brought us closer together each time it happened. And it gave her an orgasm that left her unconscious three times out of five.

Watching our little miracle grow and learn was like deja vu all over again. I’d gone through it with my son, but his mother did most of the work; this time, I made sure that I did my part. Diapers were changed, baths were bathed, laundry was washed and food was cooked, and the years went by.

Chapter 7

We opened seven more pizza units in the next five years, for a total of ten corporate stores; we had written contracts with each of the managers and supervisors, our employee turnover was lower
that one could ever hope for because we paid well, with fair bonuses and profit sharing. After those ten units were solidly operating, we began to sell franchise units. Money poured in like water over the falls. We saved carefully and made sure that we always had a large chunk of liquid cash set aside for a rainy
day; being bankrupt had instilled a passion for safety nets in me.

The day that Hope started Kindergarten, I became a classroom mommie. It was awkward in the beginning, I was older than every person connected to the class and children can be blunt. “Why are you so old?” The question came from a little Latino girl as I helped clean up a paint mess near the coat closet.

“Well, Leticia, I’m old because I was born a long time ago.”

She gave me a perfect, ‘no shit’ look and said, “I know that, but why are you Hope’s daddy and not her granddaddy?”

“I’m not sure how to answer that question, Leticia. Maybe you should ask your mommy when she picks you up today.”

She said, “Okay, Barry.” Almost all of the children called me by my first name; a few called me ‘Hope’s Daddy’. My daughter was smart as a whip and she got along well with almost everybody. Her
independence was one of her most endearing qualities; she had no problem asking for hugs and lovings, but would work at a problem by herself until she had it figured out, or decided that she needed more information. Her ability to work logically through an issue never failed to amaze me.

Chapter 8

Christmas that year brought its own surprise gift from my mother-in-law. She absolutely loved her granddaughter and we made sure that they spent as much time together as their schedules allowed. We invited her to our home for the holidays each year, but she never seemed to be able to make it; this year she told us that she would be there.

My son along with his wife and my new grandson were flying in and Anna’s brother had told us that he would stop by for a few hours on Christmas Eve. When the Christmas Eve Present Tradition was finished and dinner was over, Hope and little Barry Three, my grandson, went off to bed and we settled onto the couch for whatever Sue decided to do next.

“Barry,” she started slowly, “I was wrong about you. You’re not a sick pedophile or a low-life scumbag.” She stopped there, obviously embarrassed about something. “I was sure that you were a fuck-her-and-forget-her kind of loser; but you’re not. There is no one who could have given my little Anna a better life.” She clapped her hands together excitedly, almost bouncing on the couch, “My daughter is graduating from college this spring! And Hope is just the most wonderful little thing; I love her so much. You are a good husband and a good provider and a good father.” She stopped again. “I…I just don’t know what else to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything, Sue.” I said quietly, “If you truly mean this, then it is the best Christmas present that I could have received. Thank you.”


Now, many years later, I still think about that night in the car when she took an amazing chance with an old broken man. Now our lives are as good as any could ever expect. Hope will be a senior in the same college that my grandson Barry Three (or Bart, as he likes to be called now) will be starting at in the fall; she earned a full-ride academic scholarship. We sold the pizza business for an obscene amount of money and we spend most of our time with family and friends now. She’s as horny as she ever was,
and I do my best to keep up with her.

I love my pizza girl.
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... and fetch the slipper, young lady!

The cane seems to be by far the most common spanking instrument in Europe.. at least in England, from what I can gather. Also very popular seems to be the slipper. The cane and slipper from what I see, appears the most often to be utilized in videos and talked about over there.

It took a while, but the cane has made it to America to start to become a little bit more popular within spanking households and communities.

The slipper has not made its way across the Atlantic yet, though. Not that I have seen anyway. None of my friends has been spanked or has spanked with a slipper.

As with all things, especially spanking related, I try to not prejudge until it is experienced. Some things, of course, I will have strong opinions on, that can't be helped. But, I just hadn't thought of getting whacked with footwear. But, I was determined to give the slipper a try. And with a very willing partner that has no problem at all trying new things spanking, I did so.

Here at the edge of the desert, it gets cold to very cold at nights and early mornings. Because of this, Mike and I both have slippers that we put on when letting the dogs out, getting the paper, and other things that take us out to the cold.

This pair is just like mine and his is the same type but a dark grey.

Well yesterday I gave our slipper soles a good cleaning as the last thing I wanted was to get whacked with anything dirty and set about to trying slipper spanking.

So, when we were ready, I took off my shorts and panties, laid across his lap. Now this was to try just the slipper so with a nice white surface as I hadn't had a spanking in like a week, and with no "warm up" hand spanking, Mike set to slowly using the slipper.

When I had no reaction, he picked up the pace and strength. After a couple minutes, I told him he is going to have to do it a bit harder for it to do any good. Sure, I was feeling it, but having been spanked for years now, it was really no discomfort, certainly nothing nearing a pain and really it was just making things nice and warm. Mike then surprised me by saying he had been using pretty much full force for a while. We tried a little longer and after around 60 or so swats, we called it quits.

I had a look in the mirror and my bottom had gone a light pink. But nothing like if I had 60 swats with anything else, even his hand.

Well, as long as I had him in a spanking mood, we went on to bigger and better spanking and the resulting fun afterwards, but this post is about the slipper.

On reviewing the experience, I found nothing like what I had been seeing around the net regarding the slipper.

For instance, this:

As this is apparently from a commercial clip, I can only conclude that this reaction to a swat was a bit of theatrical embellishment

This was more like my experience

 Her looking back as if to say, I'm fine. In fact more, more. A bit of pink from the swats.

Like here as well.

 I came across some that showed quite a bit more results of the slipper at least at first glance like this. Where there seems to be quite a bit more color

 But, if you could look right before she started in with the slipper,

that coloring was already there from her hand.

I think we gave the slipper a very fair try, but in the end, it was far from a formidable spanking use. In fact it seemed pretty mild and actually pleasing.

Keeping in mind that I suppose if we had went on for a long time maybe with hundreds of swats, eventually there would be a good deal of soreness and marks. But, really can't that be said about anything, even wet spaghetti, eventually. And anyways, I think his arm would give out before I would.

Did we have it wrong? Girls, when you get whacked with a slipper, is it a different experience for you? and how? Guys, what kind of reactions do you get when you use the slipper?
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Is it any Wonder?

Is it any wonder that a kinky girl has to buy so many more panties than those that are not as lucky to be like us?

Just have a look at what a lot of us have to endure (granted gladly).

There comes a point during spankings of a length or intensity where the heat and sting makes it nearly impossible for a girl to stay still. Admonishments to keep still are just not going to do much good. The impulse to move, to kick, wiggle, and try to escape is just about involuntary.

When this happens and panties are still on and down like arund the knees and ankles, then waistbands and leg bands get all stretched out and we are left with expensive rags once the spankings are all over.

Now, guys, I know what you are thinking. That it keeps the leg kicking to a minimum and this is true. But, I ask, really how often does the kicking get to really be in the way of you giving the spanking or in danger of you getting a foot upside the head. And besides, I know you don't exactly hate the view that all that wiggling and squirming and kicking is providing you.

However, I can understand if the kicking might get out of hand say if you been spanking for a while with say a hairbrush or paddle that has that sting and heat just building to an awful inferno and maybe the legs are getting a little too wild.

If that is the case, there are plenty of positions or things you can do to keep it under control.

But I can understand wanting the more personal, intimate over the lap positions that will work also

But, panties half off, while it might work somewhat,

 is just gonna get them stretched out and need replacing and lingerie has only gotten more expensive.

So how about a deal guys, either take the panties off all the way or no getting mad when the Victorias Secret bills come. Ok?
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